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Law firm ‘Talent Show’

By October 14, 2006Legal humor

Watch out, year-end holidays (& related events), are coming soon:

"Christmas Party Committee.

"Have three words ever struck more dread in the hearts of office workers? Especially when they’ve only just started working somewhere and, accordingly, get assigned whatever the more seasoned employees avoid like the plague (i.e., savings bond campaigns)? Especially when it’s only the beginning of August, the temperatures are in the triple digits, and Christmas is virtually the last thing on anyone’s mind at the moment?

"’It’s only August,’ I pointed out. ‘Why do we have to start doing anything now?’

“’Oh you know how these lawyers are,’ said the chief counsel’s secretary. ‘You have to start prepping them early.’ (This is the same person who also thought we should make our Christmas lunch reservation no later than Labor Day since ‘all the good places fill up.’)

"’Maybe we could do a talent show,’ one of the paralegals suggested.

"My peers were instantly excited. I, on the other hand, instantly cringed. Talent shows, as everyone knows and yet no one ever dissuades, are always proposed by groups that have no perceptible talent. It seems, at least, to be one of those quirky laws of the universe. Just as predictably, my background in theater has always meant that I am the obvious and most qualified candidate to direct these well intentioned and yet talent-challenged troupes.

"History, as you might have guessed, was about to repeat itself.

“’I think we need more structure than just a talent show,’ said one of the secretaries.

“’Besides,’ another added, ‘it’s hard to tap-dance on carpet.’

"’Maybe we could do a play or something,’ said another voice.

"Directing lawyers in any kind of theatrical production, I opined, would be akin to herding cats."

Story by former actress and theater director Christina Hamlett….

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